All the Single Ladies

Previously, on My Princess Diary blog…

I discussed the intricacies of BYU dating. I’ve hinted at my “journey of attraction,” i.e., liking a bunch of guys, focusing on one and trying to make him like me, whining when he doesn’t like me, and then, this semester, finally entering into a relationship.

It lasted six days.

I ended it for a variety of reasons, but after it was over, I was different. I didn't want a boyfriend anymore. For the first time this year, I didn't like anybody. I wasn't on the hunt, looking for someone to like, trying to get someone to date me. I felt...free.

And I officially embraced my status as a Single Lady.

For the rest of the semester, this blog will be dedicated to my exploits as a Single Lady, which will be much more interesting than reading my endless complaints. To begin, let's discuss what a Single Lady, as I mean it, actually is. 

Single Ladies:

-Either love independence or fear/hate commitment (usually both).

-Are not afraid to venture forth alone on a Friday or Saturday night

-Usually break hearts, rather than have their hearts broken

-Have quite a few guy friends

-Often flirt with their guy friends, but staying far away from anything serious

-Don't go on many dates

-Have no problem staying in on a weekend (should they choose) and watching a movie in bed 

-Are happy with themselves, not needing anybody else, ESPECIALLY NOT guys, to make life enjoyable or interesting

Single Ladies rock, and I'm proud to be one. You see, relationships can be stifling. If you're like me, you like to be fully in control of your own life. I believe the point of a relationship is compromising, and setting aside your own happiness so that the person you love can be happy. One day, when I fall in love, I'll be able to do this. Maybe. But for right now, I'll do what I want, even if I have to do it alone.

Essentially, being a Single Lady is all about attitude. It's purely attitude that distinguishes a Single Lady from a Future Cat Lady, or FCL. One spends her dateless weekends complaining that no one will ever love her. The other looks at her dateless weekend as a chance to do whatever she wants, with whoever she wants. For instance, last weekend, I went and walked around an art museum for an hour and a half, because I love art museums, and I had no other obligations. The next day, I went and had a movie night with some other Single Ladies. Two extremely fun and dateless weekend-days.

Yes, relationships are important, and learning how to put other's desires and needs before your own is important, but I'm young, all the guys I know are about to go on missions, and the whole world is waiting for me to take it by storm. I love being single. 

For the rest of the semester, you can look forward to tales of my exploits as a Single Lady. Before I go, let me leave you with a list of a couple of awesome Single Ladies from history (note: these ladies never got married, but Single Lady-hood is not a permanent state. It's more of a state of mind that helps one navigate life in the shallow end of the dating pool.)

Queen Elizabeth I: What a beast. Under her reign, England shook off the ashes of the failed religious tyranny of Henry VIII and Bloody Mary, experienced a cultural Renaissance, and became a world power. One of the best rulers England has ever had. 

Jane Austen: I love this woman. I think that if we'd lived in the same place at the same time, we'd have been best friends. Wrote the original chick-lit books, which are not only hilarious and perfect (or "light, and bright, and sparkling," as she described Pride and Prejudice), but actual social commentaries, worth studying in school. Two hundred years later, girls are still gaining hope and strength from her books. If she'd gotten married, she wouldn't have been able to dedicate her life to writing, and the world would have really missed out.

Princess Jahanara: I first learned about her through the Royal Diaries book series. She was the daughter of Shah Jahan and Mumtaz Mumtal, who became the most important lady of the court after her mother's death. She was an adviser to her father, and took on many social aid and community welfare projects, like an Indian Princess Diana. When I first learned about her, I pitied her because she never was given the chance to marry, but I later realized how much she was able to benefit the world as a Single Lady.

Please join me on my adventures in Single-hood. For all you FCL's out there, don't be afraid to be alone. It's not the same as loneliness. For all you happy couples, congratulations. I wish you the best. For all you single guys who read my blog...I don't actually have anything to say to you. I'm not a guy so I can't give you any advice. Sorry.

What new surprises lie in store? (A million points to anyone who gets that reference)

Love from the Single Side,

Princess Emily <3